When you’re looking for “The One”, it’s easy to get caught up focusing on one man.
But that’s exactly what will keep you from finding the person who is truly right for you. Here’s why…and what to do about it.
Once we meet a man we really like, we women tend to dive right in. We want to give our hearts, mind and very soul to a man, and meld together into a perfect relationship. We give away our exclusivity before a man gives us the commitment we want.
When we close off our options with other men too soon, we actually sabotage our ability to get the commitment and intimacy we so desire. It’s the biggest mistake women make, and you need to stop it – right now! – and start dating many men at the same time until you have the commitment you want from the man who is right for you.
NO MORE NEEDY VIBE THAT PUSHES MEN AWAY
When you have all your hopes and dreams wrapped up in any one guy, it’s natural to fear losing him…and losing you. You become obsessed with every phone call, jump when he says jump, and change from the attractive, interesting woman who intrigued him into someone needy and clingy he feels pressured to check in with.
Instead, keep your options open to keep your sanity and remind him that you are a prize to be won. When you stop over-investing too quickly, you’ll start getting the kind of affection and attention you crave.
HELPING YOU CHOOSE A PARTNER WISELY
It’s hard to see the red flags when there is only one guy on the horizon. If you think he’s your only hope, you tend to gloss over things about him that indicate he’s a good match. These red flags become landmines over time, and suddenly you’ve wasted a lot of love and affection on someone who isn’t deserving of you.
Dating is about getting to know different people until one special person emerges as the cream of the crop, and you both decide to take things to the next level. You get to CHOOSE if he is the right man for you, and have the time to find out who he is and how he will treat you.
THE RIGHT WAY TO TAKE THINGS SLOWLY
Everyone tells you to “take things slow,” but how on Earth are you supposed to do that when you’re head over heels for someone? Easy: keep dating other guys. There’s no point in trying to slow things down with a man when he’s the only one you’re dating. It’s practically impossible.
But if you keep dating other men, you are instantly able to take it slowly. Your schedule is busy with other dates and activities so that you’re automatically not always available to any one man, and it also gives you time to catch your breath and reflect on what he is revealing to you about himself.
OPENING THE DOOR FOR PLEASANT SURPRISES
I’m sure you’ve heard that you should “throw out the checklist” and not be too picky when it comes to men and dating. But I’m here to tell you that if you throw out the idea of dating one man at a time, you have a much better chance of winding up with your checklist…and more. By keeping your options open and increasing the number of men you meet and date, you increase the likelihood of meeting the man you’ve been dreaming of…rather than settling for whomever you happen to meet first.
SO DATE MANY MEN TO HELP YOU CHOOSE THE RIGHT ONE
Dating many men at the same time is about helping you feel empowered and raising your self esteem. It’s about making you the chooser…not the chaser.
So give it a try. Just treat it as an experiment. Open yourself up to getting to know as many men as you can and, when one shows up that you really connect with, don’t make the mistake of shutting down other options right away. Make him prove to you that he’s worth choosing. I’m willing to bet it will get you faster to your “one” than you ever imagined.
If you want to learn exactly how to date many men at once in order to find your one, subscribe to Rori’s free e-newsletter. Rori will show you how to navigate every aspect of dating – from how to attract the right men, manage your time, and even how to explain to men why you want to keep your options open… without putting any pressure on a man or scaring him away.