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Don’t Know Why You’re Feeling Empty Inside?

feeling empty inside

Inner Bonding

Don’t Know Why You’re Feeling Empty Inside?

If you’re feeling empty inside this may be the reason..

You can be a giving and caring person, even a spiritually connected person, yet still be feeling empty inside.

Samantha is a very giving person. She gives to her family and friends. She volunteers at a local hospital and helps build homes for low-income families. She is a spiritual person who prays daily. Yet Samantha has a big empty space inside her, a black hole of sadness that nothing seems to fill. How can this be? She is doing everything right – doing service, praying and trying in many ways to be a good person – so what’s wrong?

The problem is that Samantha does not take care of herself. She works too hard, forgets to eat and eats junk food, doesn’t play enough, and says yes when she really means no. She continually abandons herself while she is so busy caring for others.

Samantha has never learned that she must bring love, not just to the level of her heart and then out to others, but to the level of her own feelings – her inner child. She thinks that by giving love to others, she will get love in return, and wonders why she is still feeling empty inside.

The only one who can begin to fill that emptiness within her is Samantha, and that occurs only when Samantha cares about herself – her own feelings and needs – at least as much as she cares about others. However, Samantha was taught that it’s selfish to take care of herself – that she’s loving only if she takes care of others. She was taught that she will feel fulfilled within when she gives to others- that others will give back to her and fill up the emptiness within.

It doesn’t work that way.

When we are not filling ourselves by attending to our own feelings, needs and wellbeing, we will feel empty and alone inside. When we are not asking a higher source of guidance throughout the day what is loving to ourselves – what is in our highest good – and taking loving action in our own behalf, we will be empty within, no matter how much we do for others and no matter how much others do for us. We are the only ones, in connection with a spiritual source of love, who can fill up the inner emptiness.

Samantha is confused about the difference between selfishness and self-responsibility. She is actually being selfish by not taking care of herself, because others are constantly worrying about her.

When we don’t take on the responsibility of our own wellbeing, we will automatically pull on others energetically, to fill the hole within us. An empty place within is like a vacuum, sucking energy from others when we are not bringing love to ourselves. Others may try to give to us, but it’s a bottomless pit when we are not filling ourselves by taking loving care of our own feelings and needs.

I spent some time with Samantha when we worked together on a volunteer project. I could feel her sadness and inner aloneness the whole time I was with her and my heart broke for her. Here she is, a wonderful, giving woman who has spent her life in service, only to end up with a bottomless pit of sadness within. It was like watching child abuse, only the child who is being abused is her own inner child.

I hope that Samantha will someday open herself to practising Inner Bonding, discovering the beauty of who she is, and deciding to care for herself in the same way she has always cared for others. I hope she learns to bring the spiritual love that she is connected with, down to the level of her own feelings first, before giving it out to others. Actually, Samantha needs to learn to do this to save her own life, because it is evident to me that she is getting more and more depleted by giving to others, while not receiving from Spirit and others the energy and love she needs. Until she is giving to herself, she does not even know when she is being given to by others. Until she loves herself, she will not feel the love of others. Others’ love is fulfilling only when we are also loving ourselves.

[Margaret Paul Relationship Toolbox]

 

CO-CREATOR OF INNER BONDING

Dr. Paul is the author/co-author of several best-selling books, including Do I Have To Give Up Me to Be Loved By You?, Inner Bonding, Healing Your Aloneness, The Healing Your Aloneness Workbook, Do I Have To Give Up Me to Be Loved By My Kids?, and Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God? Dr. Paul’s books have been distributed around the world and have been translated into eleven languages.

Margaret holds a Ph.D. in psychology and is a relationship expert, noted public speaker, workshop leader, educator, chaplain, consultant and artist. She has appeared on many radio and TV shows, including the Oprah show. She has successfully worked with thousands of individuals, couples and business relationships and taught classes and seminars since 1967.

Margaret continues to work with individuals and couples throughout the world — mostly on the phone. She is able to access spiritual Guidance during her sessions, which enables her to work with people wherever they are in the world. Her current passion is working on and developing content for this Website, as well as distributing SelfQuest®, the software program that teaches Inner Bonding® and is donated to prisons and schools, as well as sold to the general public.

Margaret is passionate about helping people rapidly heal the root cause of their pain and learn the path to joy and loving relationships.

In her spare time, Margaret loves to paint, make pottery, take photos, watch birds, read, ride horses, and spend time with her grandchildren.

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