Connect with us

How Do I Date

Do You Want To Create A Deep Connection With Loved Ones?

connection

Relationships

Do You Want To Create A Deep Connection With Loved Ones?

Discover what you need to do to have this connection with a partner or other loved ones.

As social beings, our desire for connection is a deep and powerful force within us. Babies who do not experience connection with a caregiver do not thrive or may even die. Deep connection with another is one of the greatest joys in life.Yet for many people, this deep and joyous connection eludes them. Try as they might, they cannot seem to find the connected experience that they so deeply desire.

There is a very good reason for this.

Many of us were brought up to distrust our own feelings and experiences. I was consistently programmed to disconnect from and discount my inner feelings, experiences, and inner knowing. Instead, I was taught to trust an external source – my parents – to define what was right or wrong for me, good or bad for me. The more I learned to disconnect from my feelings and my inner knowing, the more I disconnected from my authentic Self and sought connection from outside myself.

I tried to connect with my husband through being whatever I thought he wanted me to be, and he tried to connect with me by trying to have control over getting me to be what he wanted me to be. We were a perfect pair! No wonder our deep connection with each other rarely lasted for more than a few minutes at a time!

The problem is that we cannot authentically connect with another unless we are connected with our authentic selves. If we are not defining ourselves from within, then we consistently attempt to define ourselves eternally, by doing whatever we can to have control over getting love, approval, attention, sex, agreement, and so on. We confuse true connection with the momentary good feeling that comes from getting what we want from another. We think that relating to another from the wounded ego part of ourselves and getting what we want to feel externally validated is connection. It is not.

Connection with another is a mutual experience of sharing our authentic selves with each other and each receiving caring, understanding, and support – the mutual feeling of being received and cherished for who we each really are. It is truly one of the highest experiences in life. But this wonderful experience is not possible unless we are both able to share as our authentic selves. It is only when we are deeply connected with our own feelings, our own thoughts, and our own inner knowing/spiritual guidance that we can authentically share ourselves.

Sharing our wounded ego selves is sharing who we have created ourselves to be to have control over getting love and avoiding pain. There is no reality, no truth, no authenticity to our ego wounded self. Authentic connection is not possible from an inauthentic part of ourselves. No matter how much you may want the joy of authentic connection with your partner or others, it cannot occur until you authentically connect with yourself.

The practice of Inner Bonding is a powerful way of healing the ego wounded self and discovering your authentic self.  These transformational 6 Steps start with practising noticing your feelings with compassion rather than with judgement. As you learn to embrace your feelings rather than avoid them, you can choose to take responsibility for causing them or for nurturing them. You can move into a deep intent to learn about what self-judgements and erroneous beliefs may be causing your painful feelings of anger, hurt, frustration, guilt, shame, anxiety or depression. You can learn how to open to learning with the highest part of yourself – your Higher Self – who is filled with love and wisdom. You can learn from your Higher Self to define yourself rather than to look to others to define you. You can learn to take loving action in your own behalf. And, finally, you can learn to share your authentic love, caring and understanding with your loved ones.

If you want a deep and joyous connection with your loved ones, then first learn to create that deep and joyous connection with your Self.

[single_testimonial id=23808]

Find out how Inner Bonding has helped Alanis Morissette to evolve in her courage to love.

Author’s Books

CO-CREATOR OF INNER BONDING

Dr. Paul is the author/co-author of several best-selling books, including Do I Have To Give Up Me to Be Loved By You?, Inner Bonding, Healing Your Aloneness, The Healing Your Aloneness Workbook, Do I Have To Give Up Me to Be Loved By My Kids?, and Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God? Dr. Paul’s books have been distributed around the world and have been translated into eleven languages.

Margaret holds a Ph.D. in psychology and is a relationship expert, noted public speaker, workshop leader, educator, chaplain, consultant and artist. She has appeared on many radio and TV shows, including the Oprah show. She has successfully worked with thousands of individuals, couples and business relationships and taught classes and seminars since 1967.

Margaret continues to work with individuals and couples throughout the world — mostly on the phone. She is able to access spiritual Guidance during her sessions, which enables her to work with people wherever they are in the world. Her current passion is working on and developing content for this Website, as well as distributing SelfQuest®, the software program that teaches Inner Bonding® and is donated to prisons and schools, as well as sold to the general public.

Margaret is passionate about helping people rapidly heal the root cause of their pain and learn the path to joy and loving relationships.

In her spare time, Margaret loves to paint, make pottery, take photos, watch birds, read, ride horses, and spend time with her grandchildren.

Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

More in Relationships

Best Dating Sites

Categories

Must Reads

To Top