There are many experiences that create momentary happiness, but there is only one experience that is truly the greatest joy in life.
Take a moment to think about what you believe is the greatest joy in life.
- Getting love or approval?
- Having lots of friends?
- Being financially successful?
- Being famous?
- Being married?
- Having children?
- Having great sex?
- Winning competitions?
- Being highly creative?
- Having power over others?
- Having a big house?
- Winning the lottery?
Research indicates that none of these create lasting joy. They may bring you temporary happiness, but not long-term deep joy. In fact, the pursuit of any of these may be in the way of the greatest joy in life.
The greatest joy in life is the experience of sharing love.
What does this mean?
When you were a child, did you ever have the experience of having made something special or having saved your money and purchased something special for one of your parents, and you were so excited to give it to them that you could hardly stand it? And how did you feel when your parent received your gift with joy and excitement? Did you feel a wonderful fullness in your heart? This is an experience of sharing love.
If your parent didn’t receive it with love, how did you feel? Were you crushed?
Being together with someone, feeling safe, and sharing love energetically from open hearts – even without words – is without a doubt the most fulfilling experience in life. Getting love, or getting any of the items above, doesn’t compare to the joy of sharing love.
Yet many people don’t experience this great joy in life in a long-term relationship.
Why is this?
Usually, it’s because they are not focused on sharing love. Instead, they focus on getting love or avoiding pain. When this is the focus, the heart is closed and loved cannot be shared.
Love is not something we manufacture within our body. We can’t make ourselves feel love within or love for another. Love is a gift of Spirit that enters your heart when your heart is open.
What opens or closes your heart?
Your intent to protect against pain closes the heart. When your heart is closed, the love-that-is-God has no place to enter. You are always surrounded by that beautiful energy of love, but you can’t feel it when your heart is closed due to your intent to protect/avoid/control.
When your intent is to love yourself and others and to learn about any blocks to love, then your heart is open and the gift of love enters your heart.
This is when you can share love.
The more you practice Inner Bonding, the more you develop the neural pathways in your brain for being an open, spiritually connected loving adult. This is what allows you to share love.
People who were brought up in a very loving and supportive family with parents who were able to share love with their spouse and with their children, already have these neural pathways in their brain. It’s natural for them to have their heart open to sharing love.
Unfortunately, too many of us were raised by parents who were wounded and were not open to healing their woundedness. Their wounded self was in charge with the intent to protect/avoid/control, so they couldn’t share love with each other or with us. They didn’t role model an open heart.
This is one reason that the practice of Inner Bonding is so important. The more you practice the Six Steps of Inner Bonding, the more often you are able to keep your heart open to learning and loving, and the more often you are able to share love with others whose hearts are also open – and experience the greatest joy in life!
[Margaret Paul Relationship Toolbox]