Our Experts' Q & A

Long Distance Relationships Are Extremely Difficult

Published on Mar 8, 2014

how do I handle a distance relationship for 10yrs

Dear James,
There exists a lot of controversy in the research about maintaining the integrity of a long distance relationship. There are various barriers to intimacy, and often uncertainty in such relationships. In addition, it may seem easier to idealize a person who is at a distance than a person you see every day. However, some people believe that a long distance relationship keeps the flame glowing longer. I do not know you or your circumstances, which are of course must be unique, but it sounds like you want more of something. Explore this with your partner in a way that both of you can speak to the health of your relationship, even if it must be at a distance.

Mary Lamia

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Mary LamiaPh.D.

Dr. Mary Lamia is a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst who works with adults, couples, adolescents, and preteens in her Marin County private practice. She is a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, California. Extending psychological knowledge to the public has been her endeavor for thirty years. Dr. Lamia’s opinion has been sought in hundreds of television, radio, and print media interviews and discussions, and for nearly a decade she hosted a weekly call-in talk show, KidTalk with Dr. Mary, on Radio Disney stations. Her books include: Emotions! Making Sense of Your Feelings; Understanding Myself: A Kid’s Guide to Intense Emotions and Strong Feelings: and, The White Knight Syndrome: Rescuing Yourself From Your Need to Rescue Others.

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