How Do I Date

Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.

Vital stats: Berkeley, 57, partnered, three children (M34, M28, F24), married once for 17 years. Educationally: Ph.D. in evolutionary theory, masters in public policy Vocationally: MBA professor of strategic foresight, business consultant and communications trainer, academic researcher. Historically: I've taught over 250k college-student/hours in psychology, sociology, rhetoric, philosophy, advertising, economics, history, English, cultural studies, marketing and strategy. I founded a non-profit environmental lobbying organization in DC, worked as a business consultant and public affairs director for large companies, ran a foundation, designed and implemented water projects in Guatemala. For seven years I lived on the world's largest hippie commune, and was an elected elder there at 24. Authority: None. I never refer to myself as an expert in anything, but rather a specialist in those questions that interest me (see below). I write with no authority. I read lots but cite rarely in my articles which should be read as opinion pieces, not declaration of scientifically proven fact. I will not pull rank on readers: My ideas are only worth considering only if they're based on good reasoning. I change my ideas over time. Caveat emptor. They say "don't believe everything you think. I'll go one further: I don't believe everything I write, in that for every argument I make, I aim to be able to express convincingly the counterargument. I try to live by the F. Scott Fitzgerald quote: "The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function." Self-expressively: I've written over 600 articles for Psychology Today, coined over 400 psychology neologisms. I write songs and limericks. I play bass and sing in jazz, Latin, funk, and Nigerian groups three nights a week. Intellectually, yet intimately, my middle-age spread spans several life-sized questions. * Most cosmically, how did mattering emerge from matter?, life from non-life? mind from chemistry? economics from physics? information from energy, questions I address as a member of a 16 year research project with UC Berkeley scientist Terrence Deacon. * More practically, though not unrelated, how do and how should we shop among interpretations, deciding what's significant and how to respond to what life deals us? * Also practically and related, what is a butthead other than someone we butt heads with? since in a free society we should define morals negatively--not what you should, but what you shouldn't do. We say "don't be a butthead," but define buttheads subjectively as people we butt heads with. I seek a more objective distinction between what's morally in and out of bounds. * How do and should we balance the ambigamist's tensions and what is the underlying structure of such tensions? For this I use the Serenity Prayer as a template, and think about levels of analysis (going meta). I've written five books, only one published but the rest out soon one way or another. Negotiate with yourself and win: Doubt management for people who can hear themselves think. Purpose: A natural history Doubt: A user's guide; a natural history Mind readers dictionary: Terms for reading between the lines with greater comprehension. Executive UFO: A field guide to unidentified flying objectives in the workplace.

Stories By Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.

Compassion

How to Say No In A Kind And Considerate Way

By Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.Dec 15, 2015

How to say no in 9 compassionate ways “I don’t want to date anymore.” “We’ve decided...
Confidence

How To Build Self Confidence Quickly

By Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.Dec 7, 2015

Learn how to build self confidence quickly using these 10 top tips…. Nothing succeeds like success...
Confidence

This Is What Causes Insecurity And How To Conquer It

By Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.Dec 6, 2015

Do you sometimes feel a little insecure and maybe find it difficult to pinpoint the reason...
Relationships

Why Romance Is Not Good For You

By Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.Nov 18, 2015

If you’re someone who loves romance maybe you need to think again taking into account your...
Kindness

When Virtue Is Really A Vice

By Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.Nov 16, 2015

Virtual virtue is any mental, verbal or otherwise low-effort way of doing good. For example, praying...
Approval

How To Reject Rejection And Move On

By Jeremy E. Sherman, Ph.D.Nov 11, 2015

An enlightening list applicable to rejection in love, work and elsewhere. The obvious possibilities (Just possibilities):...